Category Archives: Descărcări neuro-digitale
Julia
odd key is out of tune
the turning never ends
a big house with big windows and bigger skies still,
the glass is half empty
even half full
and the noise is killing slowly
in your face I see the fall,
where is the beauty ?
where is the pain ?
where is that life
happy,
insane,
they die one after the other
heroes of thy father,
and I lie my ear down on the strings of a sound that never spins…
I am in the wrong,
for how much long ?
out of pity
it grows
it feeds on the sadness
larger than the world that it quotes,
blue tainted hair and blue painted nails,
it scars the skin
it bleeds
and it dreams,
in between hills
where the water spills
the burning has passed with a bottle of gin
and so,
Julia dreams…
Unwanted
I am the
I am the darkness
the might to be
and the state of being I can not control,
a feeling
lost in between times
a single line going straight to you…
you are a friend
but not the one to me
and I scream into the void
I scream my will to exist
free from fear
free from the prison I have accepted in me
I will you to be,
the one
the one that is there waiting for me
a doorway to another existence
another chance to be
free form weight
open to all
gravity pulled
sunward emotion
I need a feeling to transform my devotion,
love me
adoration
I am but a soldier
unwanted commotion,
you love me
the emotion
I am
resolution
darkness
my way is commotion…
Remember
Remember the days that have passed
you were young and free and knew no menace
and people were so alive
and you made a promise to the dearest of all
to keep your chin up and smile in the face of disaster,
remember the day you gazed into silence
stars there were running
your young love was starving and kept it close to the heart,
words could cut deep yet everything’s healing
for nothing is ever the same twice
walking away to find absolution
you only fought with yourself…
Remember the grass
it was cold on your feet on the other side of this fence,
remember you used to laugh and have faith
when you cried on the steps of a closed church…
go back from the sadness and seek on light
you feel it inside it’s not right,
and bring down these walls and shine to the world
there is so much beauty to be
just walk away from the city of lights
for the real light is burning in me…
Remember the days you were free
a sucker for friendship and your t-shirt was green
dumb in all manners you couldn’t read signs
girls might have taught you were somewhat blind
but your heart was walking in line…
Remember the days you walked her back home
and the leafs and the stairs and so many trains to the north
you drew her face in your dreams
so you broke a string just to be sure and marbles fell on the floor
dreams rolled on and love and all…
Remember the days for I don’t know who I am
will you remember the same?
Ultimul
Și dacă în romantismul meu nu e dragostea de vină,
ci prea multă dreptate,
și am scrijelit fantasme unde cuvintele sunt mute
izvoare, nu le-am lăsat să curgă
iar cu mâinile amândouă am rupt flori în noapte;
Cu ce inimă să vii spre mine
și ce inimă îmi rămâne
când încă spun o rugăciune printre zaruri aruncate
dar sunt nevrednic
și nu am fost vreodată
iar din teamă nasc himere și imposibile distanțe?
Again
painted face
mud,
my arms have roots in this soil
rewind
my arms have roots in this soil
I ran –
I ran for the sundown
the silence
colored wavy red clouds
tiny,
the yellow was young
gray stalled
call me not
rusty scissored Todd,
cold
cold
the cigarettes I smoked
for love
blue dust
and nights in central park
rebound
cry
rebound
cry
rebound
the petrol skies
lost
in the eye
where do you end and when do I begin?
within
seek in
pages left wrong
the need to feel
right
I killed before I died –
stand tall
say grace
nothingness is asking for my space
the words
the waves
meaning or mess
mud painted face –
I caved
I gave
up, up and away
cripple
sum of all deeds
hope
hands in the stone
when expecting the least
I am the beast…
Sonnet for a friend
What to scribble when there’s nothing left to say?
only scattered pointers, lines and colon breaks,
happy words I used before are turning meaningless
and the page is blank each time I do confess…
there is this growing fear engulfed in nothingness
wished I had a burning heart like the furnace in the sun
or a heart of clay to mold the passion through my days,
but I’m built from aching flesh and longings in a dream…
climbing on a ladder leading to no end
I must’ve lost the way for looking back I saw no other
only darkness dressing up the feelings I’ve held in
and I asked myself “Oh father where do I begin?“
the music
lucky notes and lyrics written for no fame
on a New York City oldest grumpy stage
with empty chairs,
in the end
music is what still remains
and there’s no shame,
we walked those roads and climbed the stairs
in pairs –
we were young and had no care
nothing could’ve bothered,
hair was long and rich and brown
riding in my mustang ’65
money scarce but love was strong
was all that mattered…
lucky strikes in nameless pubs
after shots and after dark
poured us whisky in the jar
and we never stopped the gig
until the end –
fell in love with life that I dissent
white porch, roses and a swing
so we ceased to be a thing
but music played,
nothing could’ve stopped the beat
round that summer in the heat
I did write my greatest hit
but it’s a sad song
for it was wrong…
as with poets rise and fall
Rolling Stones be getting old
and Bowie,
David’s in the stars with Cohen
and I’m even more alone
in this kingdom built from gold,
the gold is cold –
like empty chairs surrounded by a whole
it’s raining roses
in the New York City oldest famous hall,
the music never stopped…
round that summer in the heat
I did write my greatest hit
but it’s a sad song
for I was wrong…
What there is to say
morning and coffee
the window, the Sun, fresh air before noon
yesterday
the scene, the play, the rush, an old lady
the machine
“You want to get rid of your wife?”
I quit…
the pride
the drama
the shots
a walk, lemon juice, pasta
“What’s with this voice?”
Poland
a photo, three words, the white
the wish, the best
old friends
a walk in the park
the talk –
rain
feelings
the wait
hold tight, wrong, too long
alone
blue, time, no cats
the promise
“I would have…”
south of Paris, more books
fight
build
love
a daughter of Eve
a son
a dog
the Pope…
the Story –
The Poem
I want to write a poem about a time I have forgotten
I want to sing a song we played a life ago
running long the streets to another half-full café
where people kept smoking and beer was cheap,
do you remember the guitar riffs
and the full glasses with good words to sip,
used to get drunk on glances and the last Sunday hit
your red ribbon on that sky blue dress
I’ve danced you baby to the last of my deep breaths…
I want to write the words, all that I have promised
I want them engraved on a stone from the sea
for the world to know and your heart to feel it
all that’s been missing is what we left behind,
I do remember the walks in the park
pride made us wrong and guilt drove me crazy,
my way took a wrong turn and I could not find you
I took a chance to ask a big diamond
and the sun went purple in a pool of free stars…
I want to write a poem about a good time
I want to sing a song about tomorrow…
Un Jurnal Neverosimil 